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University:  Pennsylvania State University, University Park - PSU

Greek Organization:  Tau Epsilon Phi

Author:  Zeta Beta Tau touched me

Comment:  This fraternity is pretty run of the mill but holy moly I saw brother Gidney sniff a concerning amount of glue. He pulled out a comically large tube of glue from his coat like it was actually seemed to break the laws of physics. I consulted a physics professor and he concluded that Gidney seemed to have bended the laws of time and space to make this tube of glue fit in his jacket. Also brother Licsko is funneling money from this fraternity and giving it to Somali pirates operating in the Gulf of Tonkin