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You're a college student posting as Cookie Monster on Greek Rank @ 9:34 on a Friday night. That is just not healthy. I know sometimes even when you are surrounded by lots of girls in a sorority- it can still be lonely being away from home especially when you dont have a boyfriend or great bff. It can be depressing. Maybe call the student center and try talking to a counselor. It is very common to have lots of confusing emotions at this age. It is also not uncommon to try an antidepressant. There is no shame in seeking help. Also, maybe start working out or some kind of fun exercise program. Healthy choices in eating can also help with your mood especially during the winter months. Maybe get involved in a bible study group or something else to help with your spirit. Just some suggestions. Everyone has rough times.