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i would add that it varies widely from chapter to chapter. we all think about these things differently. there may be a few PNMs on campus who know exactly which chapter they want and the chapter wants them from the beginning too, but nothing is a done deal (this cannot be emphasized enough!!), and formal recruitment is definitely the most important/deciding part of the process for like 98% of PNMs. so don't worry if you don't know anyone in sororities at this point. you'll make those connections and end up in the right place!