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How about Frats as college football teams. Miami is excluded for obvious reasons. Sigma Chi: Ohio State. The dominant "blue collar" team of the North. Kind of a gritty vibe and boring unaesthetic style but have sustained excellence for a very long time. They lock down their territory (Ohio/PA for Ohio St and Jersey/LI for Sigma Chi). Sig Ep: 1980s SMU. Balling on everyone due to a very particular set of circumstances. SMU locked down talent nationally by spreading cash around to recruits like no tomorrow. Similarly Sig Ep has exploited being off campus and the types of guys they attract to work completely outside of the normal rules of the system. Both Miami Sig Ep and SMU are also hilariously preppy. SAE: Notre Dame. Been around forever. Get special treatment from administration. Categorically uncool, yet they insist they "do things the right way." Unbearably smug with unearned superiority complexes. Both haven't been elite for a long time, but ask them about it and they'll tell you with a straight face they define their realms. Pi Kapp: 2011 Oregon. Innovative. Making a lot of noise with uniforms and parties Oregon went uptempo offense, Pi Kapp has been cleaning up with Freshman girls who have self esteem issues and excessive alcohol consumption. Unfortunately won't be able to get over the hump and take the crown because of depth issues (D-Line and O-Line for Oregon. Moderately creepy upperclassmen for Pi Kapp). ZBT: UCLA. Always have a lot of hype. Have had surprisingly strong recruiting classes recently. Definitely big city oriented. Have their followings. When the 4th quarter comes orr Mansion is over you know these guys are washed. Beta: Wisconsin. Strong, unexciting, plodding squads. No weaknesses but not exciting enough to take it to the next level. No natural recruiting territory for elite prospects. Sammy: 2017 Florida Gators. A once proud program reduced to a shell of itself. Everyone else: Group of 5 schools. Ain't nobody care about the Sun Belt, American, MAC or Conference USA. Temple, Bowling Green, Marshall is hard to get worked up over. Even when UCF went undefeated last year they weren't in contention for playoffs.