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Poster Name:
Rick

<strong>Subject:</strong><br />hostility<br /><br /> Poster Message:
This may sound like a silly post. And many may just find this cheesy. As someone who's gone through depression at Duke, I'm always amazed by the hostility here. It feels like people can't care sometimes. Yes, there are truly caring people here, but the fact is this: 1. In a class, do you really get to know your classmates to the extent that you become friends? No, it's all cliquishness. 2. How many times have you had an interaction with people just seeming to get you down, be horrible to you, and be hostile or hateful? The answer varies. But my point is, in Duke, hostility is rampant. It's so competitive and hateful. If you don't know someone, you have no reason to be hostile or hateful towards them. In class so many times, it's funny how the girls that hit on me suddenly become hostile when they find out I got a better grade then them. it's funny that your friends that were seemingly loyal to you, dump you because they've joined a frat, never to talk to you again. Committment understood, but still. At times, for me I know, I felt like I entered a cold, dark world at Duke. Cliques were abundant, and they wouldn't do more than gang-bully other people. Frats were so exclusive that even talking to anyone in a frat on my hall seemed impossible. Even the post below mine (which isn't mine) talks about Key Threes being exclusive. It's a problem at Duke with this cold, hostile, and dark environment. No, I get it - not everyone can join every social circle. People get accepted/rejected to frats and sororities. It's the way it is. But please, to people in greek life, CONSIDER being open to talking to GDIs. No they're not in a top frat or frat. But if you like them, why not hang out with them? Why not be more open? Another problem is just completely disloyal friends. I knew people in my dorm, and we got along super well. Later that year the guy unfriended me. Why? I thought we were cool. If you didn't want to be friends, that's ok - but the fact is you were acting cool with me, and we even hung out like good friends, and you seemed cool about it. Why would you unfriend me after ALL THIS? Being loyal, being open to the extent that people not in your group are more than just faces you never interact with at Duke, and not being hostile can help a lot of people. You may not see it in your top tier, fraternity you were lucky and privileged due to your family wealth to join. Of course, there's more to rush than that. I understand that frat guys are busy, and rush-heavy. So no worries if you just stick to oneself - but seriously, consider at least talking to other guys on your hall if you have the time. You may like them, because you may remember the days, at least I do, in high school, where people talked to everyone. At least in my school that's how it was. Not everyone was friends, but people were open to MAKING friends. This will make for a much better, Duke. I'm not saying all top tier groups should just let everyone in. Im saying being more open to making friends in all facets of Duke, whose company you enjoy, should be important, just because sometimes diversity, hanging out with new types of people, can be cool. Now - I get it - the people similar to you in frats are the ones you RELATE to. That's ok, just talk to other people (if you want). At worst, you;ll be acquaintaces and break the walls between you. that being said, don't be a frat guy that invites a random guy to hang and then not be friends.