Getting in a house and not fitting in
by: UnsureSo I’m going to be a freshman in fall and going through recruitment. My older sister is a member of a sorority here and she’s so excited for me to become Greek and has told me she really wants me to join her sorority if I like it. She and all of her friends from her sorority and the whole chapter for that matter are all stunningly gorgeous. And I’ve come to learn her sorority is kind of known for it from browsing here.. I’m a little overweight, but I’m still relatively cute. My sister basically told me that her chapter basically will offer a bid to sisters of active members as long as they don’t have anything majorly unqualifies them for membership.. I really love my sis and would like to share this experience with her, but at the same I don’t wanna end up feeling insecure for feeling like I’m the only girl who looks like me. What are your thoughts??
#1by: Well
Most sororities won't offer a bid to a legacy unless she meets that sorority's standards. All they owe you is a second look, and that's it. If your sister is in a house that is just known for looks and will offer a bid to just about any legacy, that's a sorority without high standards. I think you can do better. And, furthermore, I think you should do better. Sororities that recruit mainly on looks are notorious for being catty and cliquey. Most of them also have retention problems. You are your own person. College is a time to figure out who you are, besides your sister's sibling. If you LOVE the house, go for it. If you are asked back on the last day, you will appear at the top of their bid list, so make sure you REALLY want that house. But if it were me (and, in fact, I was a legacy with my sister in a house when I was going through recruitment), I would make sure I choose a house exclusively because it met my own wants and needs. You've lived with your sister (and perhaps in her shadow) for the better part of 18 years. August 2020 seems like a good time to stand up for yourself and make your own decision.
Commentby: Yes!!!
Excellent decision. You are well on your way to becoming an adult, and that's what college is for. Oh, and the friendships, too.
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by: Unsure
You know what you’re right! I think I’m going to approach recruitment as if my older sis didn’t go to my school. While my sister and I are super close... we’ve got pretty different personalities. If her sorority appeals to me over the options I have I’ll go for it, but like you basically said I owe it to myself to go after what I want and need. I will ask her to help me shop for some cute things to wear during it though haha. Thank you :)
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