rush disapppointment

When I went through formal recruitment I was timid and shy - it was very overwhelming for me! I had a 3.7 from HS, in numerous, clubs and volunteer hours, but it was very hard for me to open up and connect with so many girls at such a superficial level! after open house day I went from the full count (13 houses) on open house day to 5 houses the next (I think most people had 8?) I was devastated! I was cut from the houses I thought I would join too. in the end I had three choices, only 1 I would've considered joining. So i decided to suicide. I didn't get a bid. At first I thought I was ok with it, but as the semester went on and the girls in my dorm were busy with homecoming I decided I wanted to try to join a house again through COB. I ended up joining a very good chapter here that I just "misconnected" with during the formal week because I was just a scared little freshman. So in short - I feel your pain, but DO NOT SUICIDE because it doesn't work for everyone! I was happy that there was an opportunity for me to COB, but not all houses conduct COB! It was just a lucky year the house I wanted invited me to COB.

The week is only have over (well, recruitment events are only half over). Try and tell your daughter to give the chapters that want her a chance. Don't let her drop out of recruitment and don't let her suicide.
Trust the system.
At the end of the week, if she gets a bid to a place she is miserable in after a few weeks, she can reevaluate. but Recruitment is SO overwhelming that it is easy to make knee-jerk reaction.

Thanks for the information. How do you know if a house is COBing and how do you let them know you're interested?

Very few houses COB and it is usually the ones that don't get to quota. Don't have your daughter hold out for a COB opportunity. There are all types of girls in each and every sorority! Don't listen to the opinions on this website. Most women can find a home in each and every sorority!

She can go to PHA after recruitment or email the membership chair of houses to cob

only tips
1) don't suicide
2) don't drop rush hoping to cob
3) don't go into the houses that ask you back with a bad attitude

4) do try and trust the system
5) do let go of the houses that don't ask you back
6) do try and give the houses that DO ask you back a chance

Best advice I ever received going through recruitment was, act like every house you go into is you top choice. Houses put so much time and effort into this week and you may be surprised what house you fit into with a different attitude.

On my last day of recruitment, I had one house I absolutely loved, one I was iffy about and one I despised. I decided to take a chance and suicide the house I loved. I did get a bid, but one of my best friends who suicided a house did not. It did work for me, but I think I was lucky. Looking back, I know I would have been just as happy in the house I was iffy about. The only reason I didn't pref that house was because of dumb stereotypes. The biggest advice I can give is DON'T listen to what other people have to say about each house. Listen to your gut. I know had I not gotten the house I suicided, I would have been much more miserable without a house than in my second choice. Your daughter should give it her all and let herself shine. The houses will be lucky to have her. Have her follow her gut. The system works and I'm sure she'll end up just where she belongs, whether it's through formal recruitment or COB.

I think that pledging a newer house on campus could be very refreshing. What a chance to take on important leadership roles! My daughters are in one of the "tough to get into houses," and they struggle to be selected for leadership positions because all the girls in the house have been queens or presidents. Giving your daughter a chance to shine and make an impact at a house she may "feel" is not perfect for her right now may be absolutely perfect for her next year when she's living in!

Thanks for all your comments. This has really helped. I feel so much better. I guess we'll just wait and see what tomorrow brings. Thanks again. keep the comments coming if you like.