so like a legit question

so many girls don’t even know who they are when they are 18. I know when I pledged my house it was bc it’s what I thought I wanted to be in college and the type of people I thought I wanted to surround myself with. By junior year I definitely realized that I would have fit in better with a couple other houses but I also met some of my best friends in my own house. You don’t have to fit the mold of your house and a lot of times it’s great because you bring something different to the chapter. Even though people get really surprised when I tell them I’m in XYZ house, I have learned a lot and have learned to appreciate/interact with people I’m fundamentally different from! ☺️ That being said, I would say to avoid pledging something you know you’re not, even if it seems like the “cool” thing to do. It’s your college experience and at the end of the day your happiness, not what anyone else from your hometown thinks of you.

Lots of girls want to feel like they’re part of the “pretty/cool house”, even if they are average looking/not super social. I’ve seen a lot of PNMs come in only wanting ZTA, Aphi, and Phi Mu, when those houses didnt fit their personality at all. They were dropped and then pledged a “lower ranked” or “non looks” house. Nothing wrong with it, but I think rush is a really humbling experience to a lot of PNMs.

also houses are so big now that the reputations don’t necessarily mean anything about the house. There are partiers, involved girls, snobby girls in every single house. You may be in the minority in some houses vs. others, but if you can’t find friends/“fit in” at all in a 400+ member organization that may be a sign that you’re the problem

i feel like sorority marketing plays a huuuuge role in this. as soon as you sign up for rush you notice which houses have the hottest girls, it hurts the ego to think that you wouldn’t fit in! i also knew i wasn’t a top tier kinda girl but when random ORs kept me throughout rush i was so flattered and considered choosing them even tho ik it wasn’t the best fit (i’m in a NR house and love it)

I was an in state PNM with legacy statuses to two top houses on campus (let’s call them 1 and 2). I told a friend I was 85% sorority 1 and 15% sorority 2 after sisterhood and that unless sorority 2 really blew me away on pref, I was choosing sorority 1. When I got my card back, sorority 2 had dropped me. I was crushed. That was my legacy house!! Someone in my family I share a very close bond with was a member of that house. Even though I was leaning towards sorority 1, the fact that I wasn’t able to make the decision for myself really upset me. I felt like the choice had been ripped from me and decided for me - if I had wanted to go that house and share that with my family member - I didn’t even have the choice anymore.

All this to say, I think some girls get upset because they feel like their decisions were made for them and they’re ripped of that right to make the choice - which sucks but is the reality.

I love the house I ended up in. But apart of me will always wonder what if because I wasn’t able to make the decision for myself.

I had 3 houses I loved and put them all down for pref (I rushed in 2017) I had told my self I picking this house than this house and then this one tomorrow. On pref day I get my card back with only 1 of my top 3 picks back. Let me just say that I would have never ever enjoyed or fit in well with those 2 houses. I look back on it and realize the only reason why I wanted those houses was because I felt good they thought I was pretty and good enough for their standards. I’m so glad to this day that that happened to me and I picked the best house I could have.