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Need a bit of advice

by:    

So there’s this one house I got for pref I really love. The other, a house I’ve tried to drop since the beginning and my parents refuse to pay for with one of the highest dues on the row. I told this house my situation but I’m super worried because the president kept trying to convince me otherwise. Should I take chances and drop for COB (I’d take any sorority but that one and another one with high dues) Or should I roll the dice tomorrow? Any advice? I have not attended the party of my favorite yet. Everyone’s saying something different!

Posted By: Help!
Page 1 of 1
#1by:    
#1    

There are not unlimited spots for COB. Houses that you cut or that cut you won't necessarily want you back for COB. The houses most likely to do COB are probably the ones that "have the highest dues" or that you don't want. So... yeah.

By: truth
#2by:    
#2    

Be honest with the house you love. If you’re back on pref most likely the love you too. If you cannot see yourself at the house you don’t like then don’t commit, I would suicide bid. You either get a bid from your favorite or none at all, which seems better than getting a bid from the house you don’t like.

By: Pan
#3by:    
#3    

Part 1 - Tell your favorite house that they have been your favorite all week and that you really want their bid. Explain clearly to them why you feel connected. You need them to know how you feel because if there is any doubt in their minds they will rank you lower. You need to be ranked high enough to be above their cut off in bid matching. No need to mention your other house.

Part 2 - If there is absolutely no way you would or could accept a bid to your other house, then you need to not put them on your MRABA. Doing a SIP (suicide) is being honest and better for all concerned. Just put down your favorite house, but do understand that it would be that bid or none at all, because if you aren't high enough to match with them, that's it, you're done, BUT, you would still be able to COB or even get a snap from another house. You are not violating the MRABA agreement in any way by listing one house and not getting it; no offer of a bid = no binding agreement.

Hope this helps, best of luck to you girl!

By: Advice
by: Help!   

Oh really? My rho gams told my you can’t suicide bid and COB if you don’t get it.

By: Help!
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by: ^   

I hope they aren't saying that because that's an NPC violation. I hope you are just misunderstanding. The NPC rules are very clear:

"Who is eligible for COB?
If a PNM does not receive a bid at the end of the primary membership recruitment period, she is eligible immediately to participate in COB.
Who is ineligible for COB?
Any woman who signed an MRABA during primary recruitment who declined a bid or later
decided not to initiate is ineligible for COB. That PNM is not eligible for membership again until
the next primary recruitment."

Putting only one choice on your MRABA is NOT declining a bid. You have to be offered a bid to decline it.

The MRABA states: ____ If I attended a sorority’s preference event, and I would not accept a bid from that sorority, I do not have to rank that sorority.

And also this: ____ If I do not receive a bid from any sorority I ranked, I understand I am eligible to join any sorority later,
through the COB process. I understand that not all sororities will recruit through COB.

You need to clear this up with panhellenic immediately. NPC rules are the authority at every single sorority at every single school.

By: ^
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by: Help!   

Oh okay thank you for bringing this to my attention I will definitely check with Panhellenic. I have heard different answers from different people.

By: Help!
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by: ^   

OMG yes, I hope your panhellenic is not this misinformed! I really hope it's just a case of not explaining thoroughly. I know they want people to not SIP in general, but there is a big difference in not being LIKELY to get a COB and not being ELIGIBLE to get a COB.

By: ^
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#4by:    
#4    

Hi!! I’m gonna hold your hand while I say this, maybe don’t bully other chapters just to get dropped so that you will only get your favorite one back!

Xoxo, kappa

By: 🤷‍♀️

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by: WTF   

WTF. Getting dropped from one house has absolutely nothing to do with getting asked back to another.

By: WTF
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by: Help!   

No I promise I was nice about it. I told them I think I found my place somewhere else. By trying to drop I mean the moment I walked in for philanthropy I just couldn’t see myself there. My rho gams actually advised me to tell them that. My parents wouldn’t pay dues for a house I told them I didn’t love on preference. It’s not that I didn’t like them I just couldn’t feel the connection.

By: Help!
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by: Help!   

And I was dropped by my favorite one each round. Each time I had a new favorite I was dropped. I fell in love with the one I was left.

By: Help!
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by: WOW   

Kappa, hold on a minute. She wasn't bullying other chapters at all and never said she intended to. She asked a very valid question and her parents have very valid concerns.

By: WOW
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