question
by: hiwhat percent of PNMs don’t get invited back to any sorority and why might this happen
#1by: @hi
I don't know if there's an exact percentage that Panhel releases, but it depends on the year.
Typically around 800-1,000 girls go through recruitment. Pledge classes range from around 40-60. There are 11 Panhellenic sororities that participate in formal recruitment. If we're assuming that the pledge classes are bigger and more girls participate, there will be around 650 girls receiving bids.
That may sound like a lot that don't, but keep in mind that A LOT of girls drop throughout the course of the week. Many don't like how time intensive the process is, or that it's tiring. Maybe they got dropped by the house they liked or something. From my understanding, very few girls that finish recruitment and attend preference round don't get a bid.
As for why this happens, while sorority recruitment is billed as a mutual selection process, you really don't have much say in it. It is extremely rare to have girls get invited back to all the parities that they can attend each round.
At first you will attend a party at every house for the first day, then you will progressively attend less and less parties at less and less houses until Preference round where at most you can attend 2. Meaning if you can only attend five parties at 5 houses for Philanthropy, most girls will actually attend less than that. Maybe they are only invited back by 3 sororities instead, etc. You will be progressively cutting houses throughout the week and they will be progressively cutting potential members.
Unless you are attending the maximum number of houses you can during every round, the sorority is actually picking if YOU as opposed to your schedule being determined by YOUR rankings. Many girls attend house parties they don't want to attend in later rounds because of this. At Pref you will rank one house ahead of the other as your favorite and if you get invited back to both for bid day, your ranking chooses your house. But if you only get invited by one, that will be your house and they effectively choose you.
Comment#4by: sorority
Another reason a girl might not be invited back to a house is if they present major red flags, especially in the first few rounds. Red flags would be things like talking excessively about boys, drinking, asking what houses the sorority tends to mix with etc. On the first day we had a girl say something along the lines of “I’m really good at being fake” which is a HUGE problem and absolutely not the type of girl we want to be involved with, so we did not invite her back. Girls with extremely undesireable personalities and attitudes will not get into the house that they want no matter how pretty they are or how many followers they have; we can see right through it and want girls who will add to the chapter and not bring us down.
#5by: former pnm
okaaay, so at a few of the houses the girls like realllly led me on and made it seem as if i'd definitely be invited back? when i got my schedule back i was shocked to see i wasn't invited back to the one that i really loved but had felt like they'd liked me as well. one of the girls even gave me a hug and they just sort of made it seem as if i'd definitely be invited back?? just curious if this is a normal feeling or if i just overestimated the vibe?
by: .
without knowing what they said, it’s hard to tell if this is standard practice or not. saying, “have a great rush and i hope i get to talk to you again soon” is fully in bounds and really normal—every house wants girls to like them. saying, “have a great rush and i’ll see you tomorrow” is not normal and not allowed.
keep in mind:
1. in most houses, everyone who talked to you gets some input. you might have had a great conversation with one girl, but if you didn’t have great conversations with all the girls, that might not be enough to save you.
2. they genuinely might have liked you—they just might have liked other girls even more.
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by: @pnm
If you're a good recruiting house, you are generally VERY good at making girls want to join by making them feel as comfortable and wanted as possible. There is definitely a difference as to what is considered doing that and what is dirty rushing.
Recruiters can hug you, touch you, whatever. That's normal, and with most people, just smart recruiting.
They can't let you leave the house with anything from that house, like the cup for water you get or a napkin. That could be misconstrued as a bribe. If they let you walk out the door with it, they'll get fined.
Recruiters can't say "see you tomorrow" because it implies that, again, you'll be back for the next day, which they don't know will be the case yet. Again, they will get fined if they get caught saying this.
Recruiters can make "I statements" like "I really enjoyed our conversation today," "I really like you," "I can see you here," etc. These will generally come on Pref night as a way of letting a PNM know that they want to seal the deal with you, but generally not before that.
They CANNOT make "we statements" like "we want you to be our sister," "we can see you helping us out so much during Greek Beats," or "we want you here," this is bid promising and very illegal/really finable.
These are the big no-no's, but to be honest, most girls go through something similar to what you've described. Good recruiting houses recruit well for a reason. Even if you are the strangest, most anti-social, I hate this whole thing so much PNM on the planet, their goal is to make you want them, even if they really don't.
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