moms in trees!
by: For real?Obviously I'm not at Ole Miss or I'd know this, but I heard that moms really do hide behind bushes and hang out in trees during your recruitment week!!! Urban legend or for real? I have two friends who rushed there two years ago but their moms were nowhere near campus. People were even talking about it on GC and someone said, a couple of years ago, one mom climbed a tree to try to see a bid list, fell out and broke something. I'd run if I saw my mom, but maybe this is an old tradition or something and just part of the fun? If it's true, what do sorority members and PNMs think about moms doing this? If it's not seen as good thing, could a mom actually mess up her daughter's recruitment? I mean, my sorority would be scared of a mom willing to climb a tree to see a bid list.
Comment#2 by: ...
A girl I know who went through last year said her mom was so nervous that she made her, the daughter, feel even more stressed than she already was. She even stopped taking her calls. She had kind of a rough week and felt bad enough when some favorite sororities dropped her, so it didn't help when her mom freaked out over it, instead of being the calm support she needed.
by: DidOct 5, 2013 1:16:23 AM
Did she end up pledging? i hope so and also hope that other moms out there read your thread!
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by: YesOct 5, 2013 1:56:36 AM
She did pledge and initiate! She almost dropped before pref because one she really loved cut her, and her mom kept saying things like "why did they drop you and not drop so-and-so? Your GPA is higher, so what happened?" She had no idea why she got cut by the one she wanted so much, but ended up being happy where she landed.
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by: YeahOct 5, 2013 2:32:33 AM
that sounds like the mom was making it much harder on the PNM, even though I'm sure she didn't mean to. I'm glad the girl ended up taking the bid and initiating, and I hope that she's really happy at her chapter. :)
Sometimes it's hard to realize what the best fit is when going through recruitment, but I firmly believe that in 99% of cases the mutual selection during recruitment works, and it's best to keep an open mind for that reason.
Honestly, Ole Miss' chapters are all wonderful as well as huge with various personalities, so I'm sure that almost any PNM could find a home in almost any chapter here. It really is that simple.
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by: NoOct 5, 2013 10:26:43 PM
The mom didn't mean to be a pain, at least not according to my mom who knows her pretty good. She said this mom just didn't want her girl to get hurt, but then started coming undone when the cuts got bad.
Anyway, my mom is a sorority alum and does about 10 recs every year for girls from my former high school or our church or neighborhood. Most of them go here, or to UGA or Alabama. She always tells them (and told me) to stick it out as long as invites are coming, and it bothers her a lot when girls drop right before pref because she says there are other girls who get released at that time and would give anything for invites others are throwing away. She told me, and a lot of my SEC friends, that at these competitive schools, nearly everyone loses favorites, so if you really want to be Greek, you have to look at every round as a new day and try to find favorites among the sororities that do invite you back because they're all great, plus so big that you're completely close minded if you really think you can't be friends with even a few members. Well, her advice paid off for me, as I'm someone who lost her very top two favorites and didn't get a bid her first choice. Happily, I know now that I ended up in the best sorority for me and wouldn't want to be anywhere else! From the inside, I can't say the system is perfect, but it's set up to work and usually does for girls who aren't dead set on certain sororities.
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#3 by: actually
it's not that big of a deal. most of the private schools have a close knit group of parents that have known each other since we were in grade school so we expected to see our parents on bid day and it was fun to celebrate with our parents and our friends' parents on such an amazing day. there was a couple of moms hiding in the bushes year before last, but it's been so over done that the story has turned from a bush to a tree. i don't think they were trying to look at a bid least though. it was more like they were being nosy in general. you know typical helicopter mom which are a whole different thing all together. no words for them..
by: I sayOct 5, 2013 2:34:20 AM
Different strokes for different folks.
I'm sure for some people it isn't that big of a deal, whereas for others it is.
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by: PrivateOct 5, 2013 11:06:35 PM
I went to a private school in the south and no mothers come to our bid day. Is this a deep south tradition?
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by: It'sOct 5, 2013 11:11:12 PM
Probably a helicopter parent tradition. Parents should not be involved in every aspect of their child's social life. That's just weird.
Aren't traditions like mom/dad/parents weekend enough?
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#4 by: No big deal
My mom helped me put my résumé together. She helped me take my pictures. She called every last one of her friends looking for recs and support letters. She paid $1000's of dollars for a kick ass rush wardrobe. She lunched and dined with alumni so I would have their support. She was in Oxford these past few days supporting me. If she wanted a quick peek at my invite list to help calm her nerves, what is the problem? I get that we all want our independence, but I also love my mom and can't imagine her not being here to share in this special experience!
I think the only girls who were upset with the helicopter moms were those who's moms couldn't make it.
by: LovedOct 6, 2013 11:16:46 PM
by: ^^Oct 7, 2013 10:59:10 AM
y'all are emotional cripples. are you going to bring your mommies on job interviews too? how can you let them miss out on that important event? so sad and sorry for you.
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by: WellOct 7, 2013 12:39:57 AM
by: HeyOct 7, 2013 12:54:10 AM
Thanks, but my heart doesn't need to be blessed. I'm saying what everyone else in these sororities are thinking. Get your pretentious nose out of the air and keep your sweet southern aggression to yourself, sweetie.
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#5 by: Well
College students are teenagers and in most if not all cases are being financially provided for by the helicopter parents. Most of these girls have never been away from home and just completed one of the most stressful weeks of their lives. It is just as stressful for the moms who are being supportive. Trying to be calm and supportive to your teenage child at a distance is a challenge in and of itself. Helicopter parents are PARENTING their children. When you have children one day you will understand. Until then, let the helicopters hover! Be grateful for your parents and quit spewing the mean spirited comments.
by: UhOct 7, 2013 1:36:21 AM
seriously???
I may be a young adult, but I was mature enough to go through recruitment without a helicopter parent. I was also mature enough to make other decisions my first year of school. It's because my parents raised an intelligent, mature, and independent young lady.
If girls aren't mature enough to do things (such as recruitment) on their own, then they have no business going not living at home while going to college.
Sorority recruitment is so...insignificant compared to REAL stresses and issues in life.
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by: WOW Oct 7, 2013 1:53:26 AM
This just in....you can be a supportive parent WITHOUT being a helicopter parent. Being a heli is NOT parenting, it's babying, as "Hey" put it so...bluntly. All you do is hinder your child, oh wait they aren't children anymore...they are college students.
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by: Somehow....Oct 7, 2013 11:01:46 AM
PNMs managed to get through recruitment without their heli mommies during every other generation and they did just fine. They even manage to do it at other schools now. Quit coddling your self entitled kids and let them grow up.
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#6 by: Uh
seriously???
I may be a young adult, but I was mature enough to go through recruitment without a helicopter parent. I was also mature enough to make other decisions my first year of school. It's because my parents raised an intelligent, mature, and independent young lady.
If girls aren't mature enough to do things (such as recruitment) on their own, then they have no business going not living at home while going to college.
Sorority recruitment is so...insignificant compared to REAL stresses and issues in life.
by: WellOct 7, 2013 2:34:34 PM
one day you are going to have to know what to do without your sweet mama. Life is such that no one lives forever.
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#9 by: There
is a difference between being a helicopter parent and being a supportive parent.
Helicopter parents are the ones that try to be too involved in their children's lives when they really shouldn't be. They're the ones who show up on this website or greek chat and obsess about where their daughter will or did get invited back to, try to get involved in the decision the girl is making when ranking the houses, get super duper upset when a house cuts their little angel, etc etc.
Supportive parents are their for their daughters, but not in an obsessive way. They are there to talk if the daughter is upset or to give her advice if she asks for it. However, they do not cross the crazy line like helicopter parents do. They will put the daughter's fears and worries into perspective, so that if she is upset she realizes that sorority recruitment is not the end all be all in life.
by: rumorOct 8, 2013 12:00:36 PM
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by: Then againOct 4, 2013 5:32:46 PM
I also think parents have no business showing up on bid day, which a lot of them do to see the running of the bids.
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