my story
by: OnwardI got cut early on (after the first party) by almost every housed sorority. After the 2nd party, I had only unhoused left. Growing up in a family where Greek life (living in a house with brothers and sisters, the house moms, cold air dorms, activities, friendships) was an important part of my grandparent's, aunt's, uncle's, mom's and dad's lives (still is), I just assumed I would be part of Greek life too. The experience, for me, sucked. ONLY because I wasn't chosen. Had I received invites back and ended up at ANY of the housed sororities I would of course have a different opinion and would be cheerfully learning the chants and on my way to a Greek life... I'm not sure where I went wrong. The problem is obviously with me. I thought I had great convos with the girls, have a 4.0 gpa after 1st sem, am athletic and pretty...Very popular in high school, involved with a ton of activities - although none of that matters now. I wish I could have been part of it all. Wishing everyone the best, and I will not be one of the Greek bashers just because I didn't make it through.
#1by: But...
YOU COULDVE MADE IT THROUGH YOU HAD HOUSES LEFT. YOU WERE CHOSEN. sorry you need to have a pitty party for yourself because you removed yourself from the process it sounds like because you didn't get what you wanted. But I won't feel sorry for you because chapters still wanted you! Boo hoo you didn't have a housed one, guess what? Hundreds of schools don't have houses for their chapters. Doesn't make Greek life any worse off or the sisterhood any less tight. Get your head out of your ass and stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Commentby: But...
oh wow you both were popular in high school? And have good GPAs? And are pretty? And have no trouble making friends? And you still didn't get invited back to housed chapters? Wow that changes everything.
Jk. Hopefully you just learned that there are 100s of women just like you! And that sometimes, no matter what you do or how many vague criteria you meet for something, you still might not get picked. Sometimes, so one just doesn't want to pick you. And that's ok.
Nothing personal, just ya'll make it so damn dramatic like NO ONE has ever picked you over before.
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by: Fan
You SO wrong. Why should a Pnm take a bid from a house that she is not comfortable being with. That is why we pref or choose drop. No one should feel as if they should join ANY HOUSE or UNHOUSED if they are not comfortable with it.
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#2by: Hey
What I'm hearing is that you gave up the opportunity, privilege, and many benefits of going Greek because you wanted to sleep in a house? I'm sorry but that's very superficial. Greek life is about more than a house and I'm sorry you didn't see that. I hope you made the right choice for yourself.
We don't know you, but there is likely not anything actually wrong with you. You're just a normal person, and IU rush is the hardest in the country because our housed chapters artificially lower their quota. That doesn't mean that there is something wrong with you. Not everyone has to like you enough to make you their sister (or like you at all), unfortunately for you. But I always think that if someone does show that they like you (by inviting you to potentially be their sister for ex), it's a shame if you don't give them a fair chance. But that is wholly up to you and you made your decision. I hope you're able to move on and happy with the decisions you made.
by: Onward
@Hey... Yes, living in a sorority IS a privilege. A huge privilege. And I would have loved to have that privilege. I can see how ppl may view me and my post as superficial. I was open-minded in the last rounds. I hung on every word and listening to the answers regarding the activities and the sisterhood - everything. This was a hard decision for me. In the end it was based on the answers to the questions I had about living in unhoused vs. housed, observing the other sisters and trying to envision myself among them. Again, they may have dropped me too. I shouldn't have stirred things up here, and if there was a way to delete my original post I would. Very sorry to have caused anyone negative reactions. Thanks!
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by: IU
The words chosen by But are harsh but the sentiment rings true. It is a shame that the OP did not see that the unhoused chapters still offer so much of the experience that her family enjoyed. The house is a cherry on top but what she really wanted was the sundae, which was still being offered had she been able to separate the two.
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#5by: Meee2
I agree with Onward. Unhoused sororities give a totally different experience. Some things are the same, other things definitely are NOT. My sister was in an unhoused sorority at IU so I know that is not what I was looking for either. My other sister and brother (twins) live in Greek houses at another university and love it. Have both perspectives. Housed vs. Onhoused - VERY different overall. Everyone needs to make their own decisions. No one is right or wrong here.
#6by: ifeelyou
There is nothing wrong with strictly wanting to be in a housed chapter, I don't know why people are so hateful towards others who long to be in a house and with a sorority who has a house. That is just their desire!! Who cares!! Like yeah ok, the unhoused sororities are great and very nice girls, but who cares if someone strictly wants to be in a housed chapter. Everyone says it doesn't make a difference but....it kind of really does. & if someone wants that opportunity to be in a house then so be it!! Clearly we had to give every chapter a chance as a PNM, so it's not like we were completely blocking them out of our mindset. STOP BASHING ON PEOPLE FOR WANTING A HOUSED SORORITY!!!!!!
#7by: Keeping it real
It is obvious that there is a mom on many of the threads trying to push/stay positive/uplift the unhorsed sororiety. So jus please stop. You don't go to school here, you don't know the girls in those chapters and you don't know the Pnm posting. Were you one of the unhorsed girls at your school? Being in an unhorsed house, sucks! Let's keep it real here. If you don't feel like you belong or think the girls are weird, why in the he$$ should you join? It's not a privledge to be "chosen' by people you don't want to be with. We all have had people want to be our friends that we don't feel the same about.
While I'm on a roll, at each house during rush-it's at first a chance pairing. If the girl is weird/personality blows or is not viewed highly by her house your chances of getting asked back is slim. Soooooooooooo many factors go into this.
Also, every and I mean every house has some weird chicks in it. Just because the might might be pretty does not mean they don't have issues-or just plainly suck.
iu rush does suck and there are 1 Illion factors that go into it. And 1/2 of the stuff has nothing to do with you. Just saying.
I'm keeping it real- going back to bed. I'm hungover!
by: Ok
Just because we're showing Panhellenic love doesn't mean that we are moms. I'm a senior in a lower tier housed sorority. My biological sister is in an unhoused chapter. I am older and therefore have a much more mature perspective than you, and yes I'll stand up for my sister's chapter and the others like hers because I have a better perspective of what that is like than a random PNM or GreekRank hater who is just out to bash the lower tier houses. I'm legitimately sick of this elitist negativity on here. So you can go back to bed, but you can't tell people to stop posting.
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by: Get real
Agreed! and to person ok. YOU are missing what I am saying here. People are not missing out on the Greek system if their CHOICE is not to choose an unhoused that is choosing them. Wake up. I don't see anyone on here bashing Panhel. We are talking about Pnm right to choose or to not. Tell me why so,some is missing out in iu Greek life if they are not comfortable taking a bad from a house they are not comfortable with.
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by: And
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by: hi
hi i dont agree with this person at all. im sorry, but its no secret that the unhoused sororities are not respected on ius campus, and could not be more different then living in a housed chapter. i joined an unhoused sorority last year, when the same thing happened to me. the girls were sweet, we had chapter, philantrophy, etc. and it was normal in that sense....but 60% of the girls didnt go out, we did rarely had pairs, and if we did, it was some off campus house with like 40 boys, none of whom i would ever consider getting to know because truth be told, they were really weird. i was a normal girl just like you, i was popular in HS, im pretty and i never had any problems making friends, or getting involved. it was just bad luck. and the truth is, unhoused is not the same. so stop pretending it is....its GREAT for some people, and i am in no way trying to bash the sororities that do not have a house, but if you were expecting to live in a great big sorority house, with all your sisters, and cold dorms, and pairs, and frat pregames etc. then no it is not remotely the same thing, and you could see how this could be dispointing. i am very sorry that this happened to you, but do not hesitate to try again next year if thats what you really want, and also dont hesitate to try out informal you never know. find girls online that are in the same position as you-- i know its not what you had in mid, but living in an apartment has its own perks. you will be able to get in frats as a GDI
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