went through recruitment '24, wondering how it works
by: confused
went thorugh recruitment this year, and i was just wondering how ranking even works with how much your choices matter and how much the chapter's choices matter
after tours, all three of my lowest were there for invitionals, and i had five different invitionals to go to. i know a lot of people got their bottoms, but i also know people who were only invited to one or two houses. i was thinking if not all of my top 5 wanted me, i'm happy just to go to 2 or 3, and i didn't want to go to my bottom choices at all. i usually have an open mind, but the girls i met at my bottom choices were just not very fun to talk to.
then, when it came to preferences, i didn't get my top two either. when i was lining up for one of my invitionals, the girls next to me were talking about how they weren't even going to try for the chapters they didn't want so that they wouldn't even be asked to come back (cheating the system), and i thought about doing that, but i wanted to have an open mind. anyways, i ended up getting bids from the chapter i didn't want, but i wonder if it's because a lot of other people went into their invitionals for the same chapter without putting in any effort.....
also i am considering doing COB, but i wouldn't if the chapters i actually wanted didn't want me at all. does anyone know if it's a hard yes or no, or a "yes we would take her but only if these other people wouldn't" type of vibe? because if it's the first one, i don't think i will bother, because even though i thought i connected with the girls, maybe they were just being nice to be nice. i don't wanna try and do cob if they didn't actually like me at all
also just wondering if it's only the girls who spoke w u who get a say, or if it's the entire chapter, and how that works
#1by: Hey girl
Hey girl, I am really sorry this happened. Basically in recruitment ubc sororities has an algorithm that matches up girls going through recruitment with houses. Often what happens is the bottom houses (that are struggling to get girls to rank them) get top pick of who they want back first (because they need to recruit more members!) and the top houses like kkg, adpi, aphi and dg, get screwed over because even if you rated them as top and they also rated you top, the algorithm gives the bottom houses preference. It’s tricky to explain. Please know that in a lot of cases top houses are always disappointed with girls they loved not coming back, so the feeling is mutual. It’s not you and it’s not the chapter, it’s the system. I would recommend that you reach out to the chapter (or at least your top 3 picks for a higher chance) and see if they are doing COB. This years recruitment had a very high number of girls going through, and top chapters can only give a certain amount of bids so people are bound to miss out. Keep your head up and if you are super determined for one, try again next year🩷
Commentby: maybaby
This is a bit misleading. Just to clear it up, “top” houses get first pick for who goes back for invitationals and preference. Since they get more people who rank them higher, they can afford to be more selective and only invite people back who they really loved. “Bottom” houses are more likely to get people they didn’t rank highly because they have to just take as many people as they can even if they mutually ranked each other lower.
For preference, the above is mostly right. They try to make the amount of bids offered from every house even. That means that for example if 30 girls go to XXX and YYY and all rank XXX first and YYY second, 15 will get a bid from YYY even though they put it second. It could be that XXX ranked them really high too, but it’s more complicated then saying that YYY gets first pick. It’s not always the girls YYY ranked highly either that get the bid, so both can get screwed in the end.
It’s not a perfect system and there are always girls who don’t end up where they hoped. You can always try again next year! Just know that it isn’t your fault, and I’m sure the girls in both houses you prefed loved you and would have wanted to have you.
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by: confused
sorry, i didn't get a bid -- i dropped out right before bids so i didn't actually go tonight. i just meant, they were both trying to give me a bid.
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by: …
girl you can still be snapped if you didn’t sign your bid card yesterday. dm the chapter, or the girl who preffed you in the chapter.
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by: confused
oh can i really do that?? idek how to approach it.. like hey i know u didn't pick me and ik u already have so many girls, but can i ask about cob?
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by: …
i mean if you are confident enough, dming a girl you spoke to directly might be wiser but totally ur call. answer will always be no if you don’t ask tho imo
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by: confused
hahaha thanks girl, you have been patient and kind. any idea what the chapter limit is for ubc? i'm just weighing out the chances of me asking them
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by: …
each chapter is given a limit for membership by their respective HQ - this is an internal thing chapter to chapter. it’s a kinda thing people keep it on the DL more of how many girls are actually allowed in each chapter.
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#3by: Hey girl 2
You will never know why your fave sorority didn't invite you back. But if you're truly interested in pursuing it, I'd DM them once they post that they are open for COB. Worst they can say is "no thank you" but at least you'll know you tried. Nothing worse than wondering "what if". Good luck
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by: confused
Aw thanks for that sweet message :') I really hope you were right because as much as I tried to go away this year with my head up, it still kinda hurt because I really thought I connected with so many girls in the chapters I picked. like the first example is I remember walking out of my chat thinking I just got a new friend.. and it genuinely felt like they wanted me too. we literally didn't have time to finish conversing before i had to leave.. also one of them just requested me on insta??
I don't know how much of this is just so I can feel better, but I can feel that both chapters I ended up getting for preference really loved me. the girls in the last one literally kept telling me they they hope I pick them.. but honestly, I was pretty sad when I saw my preferences, because I knew in my heart that I didn't want to join. no shade to those girls, I know they're both a nice group, it's just I think we had good conversations because I was willing to put in the effort and I'm a good conversationalist. neither chapter suited my vibe ):
I don't don't care about "top" chapters or whatever it is that everyone keeps talking about, but my RC gave us some advice on how we should pick based on the type of women we want to become, and I know which chapter has the women I look up to. just kinda sad and dejected because I'm not sure if I'll have the chance to do COB with so many new people joining and I don't wanna wait a year.
sorry about the long rant, I think I just had such a great time with so many wonderful women that I feel like maybe there's something wrong with me that I thought we vibed and I still didn't get them :/
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