sorority

go hang with ur big

I felt like this in my first year and I think you have to remember that the girls in your sorority have lives outside of the sorority. Recruitment is probably the only time when everyone is forced to be together 24/7 which is fun, but we're all busy with school. I'm in my last year at ubc and my sorority and trust me, its not cause no one wants to hang out with you or anything. Its because we're all super busy especially the older girls, so it becomes easier to just hang out in the smaller circles that you have. But don't worry, you will find your circle. Especially if you just joined, do not worry seriously. Wait until recruitment and the summer when everyone is over the stress and the work load and hopefully you will remember why you joined. For the mean time, focus on yourself and try to get involved in any way possible within your chapter. Hang out with girls in your pledge class because they probably feel the same way. But you need to remember that its not the sorority's job to babysit you or hang out with you 24/7!

Honestly, just reach out to girls you want to hang out with! I couldn’t agree with the above post more. The girls probably do want to hang out with you and you can definitely get more out of your experience, but everyone really is just busy with school & extracurriculars, and it’s just easier to hang out with/make plans with people you’re already familiar with.

Hope you feel more included soon, love!

I'm sorry you're feeling this way and honestly, it's totally normal! Lots of girls feel that way in second semester, after the excitement of being a new member is over and all the fun things that happen in first semester like big/little reveal, initiation etc.

The best thing you can do is reach out to girls in your pledge class one on one to go for coffee. If your chapter has study hours, go to them! If not, ask girls if they want to get together before chapter meetings to study. Actually show up to all the events your chapter is having, sign up to go to other chapter's philanthropy events with your sisters, and just be as involved as you can. The best way to build those relationships and feel more a part of your sorority is to just be present. Playing on a Rec team, going to the weekly volunteer activity your chapter does (I know some sororitys do the reading buddies program or something similar), etc.

Also, it might be too late for this, but taking on a director position in your chapter is also a really good way to form closer friendships because you are working together - even if a small position opens up in the future, take it! It's a great way to feel more involved and part of things. And, as other people have said, the whole chapter bonds during recruitment and the summer.