Coming clean about the crimes of my fraternity.

I'm going to spill the beans. Here is every crime that my organization has officially done in the past 4 years.

- Fraud
- Hazing
- Embezzlement
- Underaged Drinking
- Prostitution
- Trespassing
- Theft
- Kidnapping
- Burglary
- Assault
- Dealing and Injecting Illegal Drugs
- Illegal Gambling
- Piracy
- Battery
- Public Intoxication
- Evading the police
- Resisting Arrest
- Tax Evasion and Avoidance
- Illegal Border Crossing
- Speeding
- Arson
- Animal Cruelty
- Damaging Property
- Blackmail
- Hit and Run

But I am proud to say our boys have NEVER sexually assaulted anyone! Cheers to our amazing rush chairs for picking a great group of guys and for our members stepping up and setting a good example for the school. We respect women here at SMU. Remember: "No means No" and that someone who is intoxicated cannot consent. If you see something, say something.