Guess which fraternity I am

Oy vey what’s it take to get a good new yawkkk bagel here, the shmear is so much better in MANHATTAN. Did I mention I’m from new yawkkk? I mean if my Knicks jersey and Mets hat and overall repulsive disposition didn’t give it away. you like cocaine? tbh i don’t know how you in-state peasants even deal with this stepped on Carolina sniff, my high school in Jersey had raw fish scale everywhere. You ever been to the Hamptons? well no, we don’t technically own a place there, but my parents rent this airbnb spot once a yr - peep my ig you’ll see like 30 pics. if ur thirsty i got an open tab at frogs, order whateva (it’s the only way girls will talk to me). so yea, update on the internship sitch, so no i didn’t get the goldman sachs offer i told everyone for the last 3 years id get. but i did get in with this shop off the turnpike where ill cold call senile old ladies all day trying to sell them annuities. yuh yuh yes, I know I’m balding, hairy, greasy and look 37 years old but i swear I’m 20. did i mention my dad drives a tesla. u up? pls respond