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i did not get the bid i wanted and i can not decide

by:    

So I was really looking forward to bid day, one sorority told me that I would get a bid because they loved me and I was perfect for them so I really kept my hopes up. The next day I got a bid from the sorority that I tried dropping all week long and now I am stuck with them and I hate it. I cannot decide if I should just decline the bid and rush again next year or try to stick it out and see if it is good.. the sorority I got a bid from is mainly for the girls who weren't accepted anywhere else so I also feel embarrassed. Please help!!

Posted By: confused
Page 1 of 1
#1by:    
#1    

I know that this is a really hard time for you. At this point you can't rush again until next semester so you might as well stick it out for a few weeks and see how you like it. If you decide to drop then that means that this year you need to get super involved, make great grades, and meet a ton of women in different sororities if you want to have a chance of doing well next year during rush. I know getting the sorority you did not want is really hard, and it is even worse that the sorority that you liked promised you a bid when they can NOT do that. In essence, stick it out through the retreat, first meeting, and swap. If it is not for you that is completely fine, and by the end of freshman year you will know whether you actually want to be in a sorority or not.

By: It's up to you
by: confused   

ok! Thank you so much for helping, I am going to stick it out and try my best to stay positive.

By: confused
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by: Hjm   

You can always COB in a different sorority!

By: Hjm
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by: D   

No she can't. She signed a bid card agreeing to accept s bid from this sorority. She is ineligible to accept any kind of bid from any other sorority until formal recruitment 2018. She is bound to her chapter for the entire year even if she drops at any point before initiation. If she initiates, she can never belong to another NPC sorority.

By: D
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#2by:    
#2    

Since you are bound to that bid for a year whether or not you accept, you might as well try it out and see. You could find you love it, and you can help make your house better, or if you're still not happy in a few weeks, drop then

By: So

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#3by:    
#3    

Agreeing with what others said, try it out for a few weeks, get to know the girls and the sorority. If you don't like it, drop before the deadline and COB or rush again next year!

P.S. don't do what I did. I stayed in a sorority I really didn't like and only made it through 1 semester before dropping. Trust your gut. If it doesn't feel right, be brave enough to leave it!

By: yeah
#4by:    
#4    

I feel so sad for you, but not for the reason you think. I feel sad for you that you can't see the wonderful opportunity of sisterhood and friendship that has been given to you... one that many, many other girls did not get this year. You were WANTED by a group of girls who actually did have to cut people and make hard choices too! No sorority was just the dumping grounds for the leftovers! Every single sorority made choices, and this one chose YOU! But instead of seeing how positive and exciting that it, you are feeling sorry for yourself. So I'm sad for you. Welcome to life darling-- you don't always get what you think you want, but you can always turn what you get into exactly what you love and what brings you happiness. Join the girls who wanted you with joy and enthusiasm and make the lifelong friends you deserve!

By: Sad for you
by: mm   

I see your point, but you can't always "turn what you get into exactly what you love" because sometimes the majority of a sorority may not have loving, supporting sisters- and you can't just change 200 girls.

You do have a point, but sometimes it's just best to walk away when it isn't right for you, and be thankful for the opportunity.

By: mm
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by: Agree   

It's not the letters that matter. It's what you do with the letters. Own it. Enjoy it. Have a great time at Auburn. In four years, you will be somewhere else and those letters are everywhere.

By: Agree
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by: Sad for you   

Mm- I see your point. Maybe you can't "always" turn your situation around, but you almost always can with the right attitude. I can't think of a single group of people at AU-- sorority or otherwise-- that doesn't contain a "majority" of caring, supportive people. It's what makes AU great! If this girl has an open mind and the right attitude, she will find friends for life at any sorority.

By: Sad for you
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#5by:    
#5    

stick it out to see if you like it. if you don't like it, don't get initiated. then you can rush again as a sophomore. you might as well try, you'll be ineligible for cob this year.

By: :)
#6by:    
#6    

As others have said, give it a try. You have nothing to lose, because you can't rush again until next formal recruitment in 2018. You are not eligible to COB. Try to get to know some pledge sisters and make friends with them. Surely there is at least one pledge sister you would be interested in getting to know better. That might make all the difference in the world. If not, resign before you are initiated, and please be woman enough to tell the president and the new member trainer in person.

By: Good advice
#7by:    
#7    

I guarantee you that sorority's pledge class has anyone in it that they don't want there. It sounds like you may be too shallow to see your potential there if you tried "dropping them all week" newsflash: pnms don't drop sororities. Sororities drop pnms who won't fit in there or have a nasty attitude. The way I see it you should be thankful to this sisterhood who valued you and wanted you there rather than judgmental and bitter about not getting your first choice.

By: Mem

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