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thinking of dropping

by:    

I'm thinking of dropping out of the sorority I pledged and need some advice. I've literally had no contact from my sorority at all and I know for a fact that someone is supposed to be my "buddy" or whatever. It's like I don't exist and my roommate who pledged a different sorority is having the time of her life with her new pledge sisters. What should I do?

Posted By: JJ
Page 1 of 1
#1by:    
#1    

Give it a little time. Don't make such a quick decision. Remember, actives are coming off of a hard, tiring time with spirit week and rush. Have you been going to the house? Are you putting in effort? Have you contacted your new member coordinator?

By: wait
by: Agree   

You might as well stay until at least before initiation because she can't join another sorority until next fall anyway should you drop. Give it some time. Most people who drop a sorority will tell you they regret not having given it a chance. It has literally been only 4 days since you pledge-hang in there! You would look back one day and realize that 4 days is nothing and not a fair shot. You are in the insecure time where everyone is looking around to see what other the other new members in other sororities are getting to do. Actives are getting settled in their new living places, getting books, catching up with friends their age etc. I would suggest that you email, call or text your new member coordinator and talk to her to ask if there is something going on with your sorority that you are missing since you haven't heard anything. Give your sisters a chance like you would want them to do for you ;) War Eagle!

By: Agree
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#2by:    
#2    

I have the same problem. The few girls I have met are really into going to parties every night. Not really my thing. Is there anything else to do, other than going to a party every night?

By: Same problem
by: thoughts   

There are a lot of parties the first week. It will calm down soon when everyone remembers they have a lot of schoolwork and tests coming up. Auburn is not a school where students go out every night of the week so hang in there! Talk to your new member coordinator though. She may be able to steer you in the direction of girls who don't go out all the time.

By: thoughts
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by: Sounds like   

Maybe you chose the wrong sorority for you...

Maybe you should not have chosen based on "popularity" or "reputation"

By: Sounds like
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#3by:    
#3    

I never thought I'd have to advocate for myself as a new member of a sorority. People have told me to contact my "new member coordinator", but as a new member, shouldn't they contact me? I'm so disappointed.

By: OP
by: Me, too   

I'm from out of state and did not know anyone here. I was hoping there might be more organized activities or group communications or something through the sorority during the first week or so. It seems like the in state and GA people already have their own friend group and are doing things together. I don't know, it is not really what I expected or hoped for.

By: Me, too
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by: just think   

Every house has a lot of new members and it would be nice if the actives had time to check in with all of them. But they're starting classes too and have challenging classes, etc. If there is something you need, you're going to have to be grown up enough to ask instead of waiting for someone to coax it out of you.

By: just think
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#4by:    
#4    

I understand your dilemma, but there are a lot of pledges in each sorority, surely you have met some of them? Do you go over to the sorority's dorm and talk to anyone? It is unfortunate but when there are so many girls a few may fall through the cracks. If I were you, I'd try to contact some of my new pledge sisters and find out what is going on since you seem to be left out and then the pledge director. Find out when the meetings are if you haven't been told. You have to show interest also and there's always the chance that whoever was supposed to help you as a buddy is not a good buddy! (It happens in all the groups!) See if you can get a new girl to show you around, and hopefully that will resolve the issue. If you get out, it could easily happen with another group, so try and see what the problem is. Maybe no one can get in touch with you (it can happen.)

By: Wondering..
by: Keep on trying!   

you'll find a group within your group to really have fun with! Don't give up and go to the meetings and activities! You have to try also, it's true sometimes it's harder to get some girls involved as they are timid. All the sororities got quota so you should have a chance at finding some wonderful new friends!

By: Keep on trying!
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#5by:    
#5    

I had a similar situation during my first little bit in my sorority. I wasn't a big partier, and it was completely different from what I thought it would be. Just give it time. I now have the best friends I could ask for in my sorority. It just takes time to meet the right people. It's also hard on the older girls because they have been together and put their life on hold for the 10 days before bid day so some of them just need time to themselves/get ready for school. If you are in my sorority just know it gets better, and their are one like you in there, they are probably just going through the same things you are!

By: Same
by: thank you    

Thank you for sharing that.

By: thank you
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#6by:    
#6    

It has only been 7 days. Please don't make a decision that you cannot change just off of 7 days- a decision after 7 days can affect a lifetime. I highly recommend you go a tad outside your comfort zone and go to some things you probably wouldn't normally. NOT saying go and drink and party if that is not what you want to do. I promise if you were to go to some things you will find other people there not "partying hard". It will all calm down in a few days- especially after this week. But for everyone, you have to reach out to others whether the girls in your pledge class, girls on your hall, people in your class etc.

I promise others feel like you do. There is such a build up to recruitment and then classes start so it's kinda a let down after that just because you are not on the recruitment "high" where people are all over you.

By: wait!
#7by:    
#7    

You've made a commitment so follow through on it. There are tons of girls in every house so there are always SOME that are not partying, SOME that are from out of state, SOME that are a little shy or quiet, SOME that are pre-med majors and need to study biology, etc. Just like real life, it's up to you to find them. There is an old criticism that you pay for friends in sororities so maybe you feel cheated that your squad hasn't materialized. But that's far from the truth. You have to meet girls and it takes effort just like real life. So don't drop out, honor your commitment and find your best friends.

By: suggestion
by: great   

Excellent advice. Do the right thing. Make an effort.

By: great
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#8by:    
#8    

I hope you read through all of this. It's really great advice. Your sorority adored you enough to offer you a bid into their sisterhood. I am certain the women who were dropped from recruitment would take your place in a heartbeat.

By: To OP

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by: Try!   

Hope you got happier!! You really do have to make an effort also and if! you are not being texted or invited to do things still, tell the pledge director you would like some help getting to know some other girls, perhaps going to meetings with some of the new PC will get you on the road to knowing some of your new sisters.

By: Try!
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#9by:    
#9    

The deal is, there are a lot of girls in each class. If you can't find a group that you like the problem is with your and your own personality. No one is going to immediately know someone new - everyone has to take the time to get to know someone.

By: yes
#10by:    
#10    

I promise it will be ok and all work out. Please give it more time!!! Not like days, WEEKS! But go to stuff!!! You have to get out there and make connections.

By: friend

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