getting closer to your sisters
by: pledge life
Everyone says that new members should reach out and get to know the sisters, but I feel like the actives already have their favorites and spend all their time competing for littles. I really appreciate the actives being nice to pledges, but we can all notice when you spend the entire night kissing up to a girl just because she's the "hot" one by conventional standards. It's awkward when we see you single out a girl. Hanging out with a new member one on one is one thing, but focusing only on her and kinda ignoring the other pledges while in a group setting is a bit too much.
I, as well as my pledge sisters, go to lots of events and try to bond, but this is a new experience for us and we don't know what we're doing. I get that it varies year to year, but we depend on the actives and our pledge mom to help with the intimidation of a new member period. Even with the weekly sister program, a lot of my pledge sisters, and even my friends who are in other chapters, are feeling like we're not welcomed.
I've been hearing that people weren't happy with the turn out for recruitment this year and complained that the pledge classes suck so they're not worth getting excited for. Seriously?
Commentby: new memberOct 23, 2014 6:56:01 PM
Omg!! I thought i was the only one who felt this way. Yesterday during the flag football game i felt so awkward. I felt like i was invisible or something. I tried to introduce myself to some actives and even new members but they would just go to the people they already knew. It kinda made me feel unwanted. Its as if the new members already chose which new members they r interested in and thats it and new members already made good friends with the actives. Its like click thing
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#2 by: u
U should say something! I don't think this happens that much in my sorority, but definitely let your pledge mom know. Unfortunately some girls will be more popular than others and that is just life. also, don't be afraid to reach out! Sometimes actives are shy too and its nothing personal.
by: Active personOct 23, 2014 9:06:54 AM
^^ yes!!! I know I'm the kind of person that you have to come to me first. Also, sometimes girls meet girls that they want as little sisters and have to start wooing them from the get-go. But I would for sure reach out and talk to your pledge mom or message a random active and see if she wanted to hang out!
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#3 by: we
#4 by: @pledge life
Has your chapter had their new member retreat yet? If so, then yes, this is problematic because that is usually where bonding happens and you should talk to you pledge mom. If you haven't had it yet, hang in there until that happens and then see how you feel! It helps so much!
by: Pledge lifeOct 24, 2014 7:11:08 AM
We were supposed to have a retreat but it was cancelled. What would we even talk to our pledge mom about? I don't want to complain that she's not doing a good job :(
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by: ^Oct 24, 2014 10:53:16 AM
Okay u are not in my chapter since we had ours. Uhm Im sorry sweetie but don't be too shy. Say something if u feel uncomfortable if u feel u have reached out to others.
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by: ^^Oct 24, 2014 1:12:20 PM
If it's being re-scheduled, I would say wait until after it happens to say something. If not, maybe just raise your feelings with the pledge mom? Bring a friend who feels the same way along for moral support. Make it about you, not the actives so no one feels attacked. Maybe phrase it like "you've been having a hard time adjusting and feel uncomfortable reaching out." Typically if a new mem says something like that, the pledge mom will try to do everything to make sure you feel included because they don't want you de-pledging.
Just do whatever you think is best though! This is about you and your sisters!
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by: pledge lifeOct 23, 2014 3:19:05 AM
About pledges? I don't know how actives expect new members to participate and get involved when they blatantly play favorites with a select few girls.
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