New word record creaminess

Bro, you will NOT believe what went down at Sig Chi last night…

Dude, Thelonious went full beast mode on ‘Brotherhood Initiations.’ Pledges showed up in just these tiny gold thongs and, like, a metric ton of body glitter (classic, right?).

First off, they kicked things off with baby oil shots to ‘grease the wheels’—because what’s a party without a little slip and slide, am I right? 🤢 Then it got real: a blindfolded gooning contest contest where the loser had to jump into a freak-off for the whole house.

I’m talking straight-up mayhem, bro—guys going absolutely wild, pushing every boundary, and flaunting their creaminess like it’s some sort of trophy. How do I get invited (asking for a friend)