Sorority classes

Realizing that the houses that invited you back aren't a good fit isn't "thinking you're too good for the process." Why is it that when a PNM doesn't want to join a certain house, she's dragged as being a snob who thinks she's too good for the process, but when a house doesn't want a PNM and can't even be bothered to give her the courtesy of a conversation before they cut her, it's touted as a fair and unproblematic assessment? The reality is that this process is a numbers game that is heavily rigged against most PNMs, and falling through the cracks as a result of that doesn't mean that the house where you would have fit in best also just happens to be the one that Panhellenic is trying to fill with members to avoid closing the chapter.

Give it bitter mommy. Your daughter didn't get a bid to APhi, but it's time to move on.

That's exactly it. It's set up so that the houses can succeed. Whether or not the PNMs feel it's a successful match doesn't matter to Panhellenic, as long as the appropriate number of PNMs are farmed into each house that has dangerously low numbers.

I don't think many PNMs are basing their opinions on Greek Rank. And even if they are, so what? How is that any different than chapters making bid lists based on gossip and pictures their recruiters get from social media?

The reality is that it's a lot easier for a PNM to get a feel for a chapter and whether she feels it's a good fit for her at these parties than it is for the chapter to make an accurate assessment of whether or not the PNM would be a valuable member. That's why, if Panhel cared about the PNM's feelings, Open House rounds would be in person so every PNM got to experience the girls in every chapter before deciding which ones she prefers.

Remember, this is supposed to be a "mutual selection" process, and PNMs have just as much right as actives to decide that they don't see certain women as their sisters. I am surprised and disappointed at the number of young women on here shaming and belittling PNMs who didn't get bullied into joining a house they don't want to be in just so that Panhellenic can say it was a successful recruitment.