active sister ama

There are so many other factors besides attractiveness. If you see someone in a "top tier" house who is not "attractive," it means she is 1. a legacy, 2. has a great personality, or 3. knows a ton of girls in that house who love her.

They will often try to pair you with someone you know or someone you have something in common with (same major) just so you have something to talk about.

To the best of my understanding, each sorority makes a list of all the girls they talk to in a general order (usually, but not always, legacies and friends first) and there is some algorithm based on how many girls want to come back after each round and how many girls they will eventually be able to have in their pledge class which is applied across the board. This is designed to maximize the number of interested girls coming back to the house; the algorithm selects the x number of girls that will eventually trickle down to the correct pledge class size, whether that's a smaller number for a house with a high return rate or a slightly larger one for a house with a lower return rate.

Each house has the same number of cuts. Typically top tier sororities use most of them after round 1, while other ones wait and gradually cut girls. Each house does it definitely, but each has the same limit! So that means Kappa and ADPi can cut the same amount of girls over the entire rush process. Using your initial PNM number of 500, say each house is given 350 cuts (this is me just throwing a number out). Top tier cuts 250 girls after round one and lower tier cuts 50, those who do not meet GPA requirements.

This is bid promising and HIGHLY AGAINST THE RULES!!!! It is the biggest rule. Pretty much everything else, social media, texting, car rides, etc, can get blurred, but BID PROMISING IS NOT OKAY!! Report it if it happens to you, or else you could be discharged if you get caught. I know several girls who were bid promised by AXO last year and 0 of them received bids in the end. Do not believe in unofficial bids. They will get your hopes up and make you feel safe.

That is not ok and should be reported! No individual can guarantee anyone a bid because they aren't the only one making the decision. I know a few girls who were promised bids only to get cut. Their friends "didn't know what happened" after they were cut. PNMs do NOT believe anyone, even a friend, who promises you a bid. They might have good intentions, but they do not have that power. And if you are led on you might end up losing focus on other sororities. Keep your options and mind open no matter what.

Try to remember you only need one at the end! The best person you can talk to is your Gamma Chi. She knows you personally and can give you constructive advice and words of wisdom. Be careful about conversations with other PNMs because it is so easy to stress yourself out. Hopefully today went well. You have some time to talk to your Gamma Chi before the next round and you can make the best of the opportunities you have left. Focus on what you can still control and not on what you can't which is in the past. Good luck!

Don't second guess yourself out by comparing your recruitment experience to others. You can only join one sorority in the end anyway so enjoy meeting the members of the groups that are inviting you back. Keep looking forward and stay positive.

Connections and networking are honestly the most valuable things during rush. Often times houses you have friends in can be reflected on your party schedule. It could have been a GPA or lack of involvement issue. Just do NOT let yourself get bogged down by being cut. Most girls are NOT invited back to 6 houses. If that is what they said, you are either talking to a specific group or they were lying. My freshman roommate could never get over the fact she was cut down to 2 houses after round 1, was miserable throughout all of rush, and ended up dropping. We call round 2 a "wake up call" in my house, because many girls are told as long as they are nice, they will be invited back to pretty much every house. That is very much NOT the case. Unfortunately, a lot of girls do not realize this until after the first round when they only go back to 4, 3, or 2 houses. Try to stay positive.

I appreciate the advice. I'll add to the conversation that my GPA was a 3.7 and I am involved in about 7 different campus organizations. I guess it hurt me that I never party.

Yes, really. I've got no idea why, though.

@fresh way to make her feel better that was super helpful

Thank you. This is very well said.

I'm in the same situation. My Gamma Chi said that there is no stigma around rushing as a sophomore, and that's what I hope to do. I also really want to eventually be a part of Greek life! I know you are probably just as frustrated and disappointed as I am, but don't worry. I've met so many people who are considering the same thing that we are.

Thank you for the reassurance @same! I'm just scared that they say that and then in reality, you're likely to end up with the same results

Re rushing as a sophomore is much different in that you will likely be invited back to houses where your friends are pulling for you in the early rounds (giving you more time to really get to know other girls) but don't expect to get a bid from a top house where you have no friends going into rush